The Human Shield

Rated G

One of my clique in high school was a guy we called The Brewster. I think the nickname is somewhat informative. Yes, he liked beer.

Brewster is the guy that introduced me to martial arts. For this telling it will be helpful for you to get an idea of what The Brewster was like. He was a very outgoing guy. I would call him a ladies man. But that doesn’t really express him.

Not long ago the tv was on while I was writing some posts and there he was. The show was “Family Guy”. If you see any tv at all you may have run across it. A cartoon series al a “The Simpsons” with more bite. If you are familiar with the show, think of the sex crazed Glenn Quagmire (giggity). Make Quagmire short, 5 feet 7 inches or so, and heftier but not fat, with the same large jowls, same black hair parted down the middle, and same outgoing, sex crazed attitude. That’s The Brewster. (giggity.)

When I was about 17 I had a green belt in the art that we studied. Green means you don’t know squat. Brewster had a brown. Brown means you know something and should be able to defend yourself, and others if need be.

One evening after a football game, one of the gals in the marching band needed a ride home. Leave it to us fellow band members, and martial artists, to step up and take care of the fair damsel in distress. As we arrive at her place, she gets a shocked look on her face. “Oh no. No one is suppose to be in the house. I know I had turned off all the lights. Those lights should not be on. Will you guys come in with me, to check things out?” Da – da-da-daaa! We’re here to save the day! “Sure!”

She quietly unlocks the door. Brewster, always wanting to woo the ladies, takes the lead. The hallway light was burned out. I get right behind him as we quietly walk down the dark hallway to see if there is anyone in the house that shouldn’t be there.

Suddenly a door at the end of the dark hallway opens up!

What does the brown belt, “Let me save you my fair lady,” Brewster do? He turns around, grabs me by my shoulders, picks me up, turns back around and literally shoves me toward whatever or whomever had opened the door.

Fortunately the older sister had come home ahead of schedule. There were several quick screams, of course. I swear Brewster sounded more like a girl than he would like to have admitted.

But there’s a lesson there. When faced with the unknown, throw a friend at it.

Quagmire

Quagmire (giggity)

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